Taking Charge

I was supposed to get my blood test results back today, and the damn dr.'s office is closed. What? Don't tell me to call when you won't freakin' be there. ARRRGGGH! So, I have to wait another day. So, Evan and I trekked out to take my mom to the doctor, and instead of sitting around feeling like I have no control while waiting for her, I went shopping.

We went to Carter's, since Evan needs new jammies, and I got teary eyed only once while fingering a soft little sleeper in newborn size, then decided that was enough of that. So, I bought a Onesie for the next baby. There. I'll show you, body. Ha. I then proceeded to buy Evan a ton of pajamas for next to nothing. Man, I love that store.

When I got home, low and behold, another friends is pregnant and sent me a picture of her digital pregnancy test via email. My screen shouted "PREGNANT" at me, and my eyes welled up with tears. This is massive improvement over sobbing 4 days ago, so mentally, I'm healing well. I won't know if physically all is going well until my damn blood test comes back tomorrow, but I feel ok other than that helpless feeling.

I had read just yesterday that taking one baby aspirin a day can help your uterus become more baby-friendly, so I popped one just a bit ago, and plan on taking one now through when I'm 36 weeks pregnant. I'm getting on the treadmill tomorrow just as soon as I get the nurse's ok, and then it's back to healthy eating and that positive pregnancy test. I'm not waiting. Studies show that it makes no difference if you wait or not after a miscarriage, so why wait? The best thing I can do for myself now is take control of my life again, so that's what I'm doing.

Pity Party is now over.