Bad Bad Day

Days like today, I wish I could turn my brain off. Just make it stop. But instead, I'm tortured by thoughts that just flow, non-stop, until the thoughts puddle and overflow into other parts of my life.

Today's main thought stream is: Do you think that souls that are tortured in this life, be it man or animal, receive some sort of "get out of jail free" card in the next life? Do you think those souls get a better deal the next time around?

I'm a believer in the afterlife. Not necessarily your typical cartoon-like rendering of heaven, though that's a good name for whatever it is that is out there. But the soul of each of us has to go somewhere, even if it's just the essence of each of us, the energy, the heart- whatever you call it, there is definitely something in each of us. A lot of people don't believe that animals have that same something, but I do. I have dogs, after all, and I know and feel their personalities and sense of humor and humility and happiness. They have souls, too, and I don't care what any body else says about that.

But what happens when a soul is damaged so much in this life that it cannot go on? That it becomes broken, unrepairable, or anguished? Does it get a make-over on it's way onto the next world? A band-aid? Or will it always be a broken soul?

I have a theory that when a being dies, it soul will go to wherever it is happiest, and that in being happy, a soul can be healed. When my gram died, and I dreamt she was happy, and healthy and oh-so-real at her cottage, the place that meant the most to her in this life, I knew that's where she was. Her soul was living on there, somewhere. Whether that energy became part of the trees, or the water, or just hangs out making sure everything is ok, I knew some part of her went there.

Maybe souls get to travel the world, maybe the universe, no longer constrained by a cumbersome body. Maybe the just settle in wherever they are needed most. And I'm sure some get lost.

But I like to believe that, someday, when my body goes, my soul can go somewhere happy and content, where it can wait for the souls of the people and animals I have loved and will love, and we can just have one big happy reunion.

What do you think is waiting out there?